B is for Boisterous…

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Oh dear! Another day, another new development in the life of Mostly Mum…

This time, we’ve progressed onto head-butting. Well, when I say ‘we’, I really mean Baby C, aka Lulu, aka my adorable one year old baby boy.

Even though we’re hardly newbies in the parenting game (almost eleven years in and counting – yikes!), the head-butting phenomenon is a relatively new notion here at Mostly Mum HQ.

You see, in my experience (and there are bound to be exceptions…) baby/toddler girls don’t generally, once seated on the lap, tend to propel themselves back at their parents’ faces in an almighty attempt to extricate themselves from said parents’ grip. The ultimate result of such a swift and often unanticipated toddler move is usually a blow to either the mouth and teeth (the horror!) or the nose (double horror as broken noses are arguably a lot more difficult to fix than broken teeth!).

And yes, Baby C did employ the above method to knock Mostly Mum’s nose into what felt like oblivion the other day. The shock, the horror, the trauma, the pain and the all-encompassing anxiety when you hear yourself shriek: ‘Oh, no, my dose!’

‘Did I just say ‘dose’ instead of ‘nose’?’ you think to yourself. ‘Aargh! He’s broken my nose!’ Run to mirror. ‘I think it definitely looks more crooked than before! Aaaaargh!’

Next up, a furious Googling session…

First question: How to diagnose a broken nose?

Second question: How to treat a broken nose?

Third general query: Baby boy might have broken my nose, what to do now?!

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Picture perfect when asleep but once up and about…

He looks more like this:

Those flailing arms are quite a force to be reckoned with

And the results of my rapid Googling sesh…

Diagnosis

Broken noses usually cause bleeding, swelling, bruising and extreme pain (great, I don’t seem to have any of those!). But, not always (uh-oh! panic still on!). Even x-rays are not a conclusive diagnostic tool as mild fractures might be missed! 😨

Treatment

Unless there are red flags, such as symptoms of concussion which require immediate hospital admission, ice packs and painkillers are the recommended initial treatment. In more severe cases where the nose has been left bent to one side, surgery within the first seven to fourteen days after the accident would be advised. (Don’t think I fall into that category, but not completely sure as my sense of smell is off and have numbness but that could be caused by mild swelling, couldn’t it? Maybe I should consult an actual Dr instead of Dr Google…)

General remarks

At least the answers to my third Google query reveal that I am not the first (and most certainly won’t be the last!) parent to have had their nose whacked by their boisterous toddler boy’s head. On the contrary, it seems to be a very common occurence:

‘So I have always said that my little guy is hard-headed, but yesterday I found out for sure that he is!! I was laying on my bed and LO (little one) was sitting beside me. All of a sudden he flung himself backward (he likes to flop down on pillows), not realizing my head was there. The back of his head slammed into the bridge of my nose and I heard a loud crack and saw a bright flash. It hurt so bad!!! After spending 2 hours at the dr, X-rays confirmed that I have a non-displaced fracture to my left nasal bone. Who knew [….] a toddler could be so dangerous?!’ NatNat36, 04/23/2013, www.babycenter.com

‘My almost 16 month old head butted me this morning. I just got back from the er. He fractured the bridge of my nose and around my cheeks. I also have a lovely case of vertigo but can’t have any medicine for it because I’m pregnant. I never thought a toddler could be so strong.’ ginni1, Oct 27, 2013 at 3:53 AM, www.whattoexpect.com

‘So my darling little boy hauled off and head butted me and broke my dang nose. You talk about pain. Oh my, I have broken bones before but this one really sucks. Can’t breathe, black eyes, swelling. I’m a hot mess. Thank heavens for makeup coverage. mommytoconnor, June 2012, www.thebump.com

This is why I so love the internet. No matter what problem you have (and especially if it’s baby or child related) someone will always have been there before you and is ready and waiting, virtual tea and sympathy in hand.

And if the GIF below is anything to go by, I’m sure even the royals aren’t immune from the head-butting antics of their cheeky offspring. Yes, we are looking at you, Prince George!

Now where have I seen that move before? Oh, yes, Lulu did that too!

So where do we go from here? Should Mostly Mum invest in some Tom Brady inspired head protection (albeit modified, padded on the outside maybe to protect baby’s head at the same time)? 🤔

No need to fear a broken nose thanks to this fearsome contraption

Oh OK, a bit too extreme, perhaps! We will just have to settle for learning to keep our faces turned away from angry toddler heads, at all times! Work on those reflexes, folks! You have been warned!

Oh and one more thing… If an American football inspired head protection/anti-head butting device ever does happen to turn up on Dragon’s Den, please do let me know, as we thought of it first here at Mostly Mum HQ! (Maybe we should look into patenting that little piece of innovation, you never know?!)

If  you have any tales of toddler head-butting woe to share, please oh please add them to the comments section below. The more the merrier!

Until next time,

💋 Mostly Mum

 

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